I came across your website, Hierarchy University, and it was a wonderful discovery. Thank you. It helped me understand a little more about human nature, or at least about my own.

I am a submissive. I don’t know if I’m a “faggot” or a “beta” in your hierarchy. I have certainly always been attracted, and now I understand it better, to Alpha men who did as they pleased. These relationships were ruined by the fact that I wasn’t always willing to accept the “natural rules” you explained so well and which are made evident by the many testimonies you share.

I always thought these were sick relationships that I was getting into, and only now do I understand that what I was truly looking for was a master to serve and perhaps to adore, a true AlphaGod male. Maybe I’ll write to you later and tell you more.

Right now I have a relationship with an alpha male who governs my life a bit, and whom I serve with dedication and respect. He lives at his house with his wife, and I live at my house, but it’s as if he lives with me. In fact, I have precise rules to follow: in the morning before going to work, I have to tidy up the whole house and the bathroom, in case he decides to come over. Sometimes he comes with other guys, and he likes to find the house in order. I finish work at 5 PM, then I have two free hours, but at 7:15 PM I have to be home in case he decides to come to my place. Evidently I can also go out some evenings, but I have to ask him for permission at least one day in advance. Asking for his permission and having to wait to make a commitment for an evening is embarrassing and exciting at the same time.

My parents, who don’t know about the type of relationship I have with him, will be visiting in the next few days. Before reading your website, I would have kept my relationship with him a secret, begging him to grant me two days of suspension. But now that I better understand that I am part of a higher order, I would like to introduce him to my parents, and I would also like it to be clear to them that I submit to him and that I am happy to do so.

But I wouldn’t want to cause pain to my parents or ask him to pretend about our relationship. How should I behave?

Thanks for the question, brother! 

You have a very unusual situation with this Master. I’m not sure I understand what is going on between the two of you … is he coming over for sex with you, or to have a place to hang out, or what? What happens when he brings his friends over? Do they all fuck you, or do you serve them like a waiter-fag? Some of that is confusing.

Also, is your Master even interested or willing to come meet your parents and be openly identified as your Master? I mean, he is married after all. Is this something he’s already agreed to?

Also – do your parents know you’re gay? If not, I’d start there, and leave the faggot stuff out of it. The gay part could be enough of an issue by itself; the Master/faggot stuff is probably way beyond their understanding or acceptance.

I know you’re excited after learning the truth about your life and purpose, but you want to be as surgical and careful as possible with how you present it to others. In my opinion, the less parents know, the better things go.

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Hi Sam,

Great blog, it’s helped me realise my beta/fag side and my lust for worshipping alphas.

I need your advice…I had a straight alpha best friend for 10 years. When we became friends, I wasn’t ‘out’. We were very close… going to the gym, going out drinking (him picking up girls) etc.

He was a natural alpha…hot body, great looks, supreme confidence, controlled aggression, and a big cock (he told me and I can verify as I saw it!). He had the pick of women and would regularly tell me of his sexual activities and how women went crazy over his cock. During our friendship he told me numerous times that he knows he is an Alpha and I can tell he enjoys having control over others.

Some of the activities we would do when I was still in the closet involved sleeping in the same bed and aggressively play fighting in our boxer shorts where he would regularly pin me down – I loved it! Frequently, he would pin me down in his boxers by sitting on my chest with his knees over my shoulders, so I couldn’t move my arms, with me ‘pretending’ to struggle while staring at his big bulge. I loved the submissive nature of it and I think he enjoyed the dominance.

On another occasion, we nearly showered together after a drunken night out but he stopped after seeing I was getting a hard-on. Damn!

Anyway, after around 5 years into our friendship, I came out to him when drunk and he accepted me 100%. I was so scared, as previously he had made some jokingly homophobic comments, but he didn’t let it affect our friendship and would often stick up for me if we went out on nights out etc.

Fast forward to around 2 years ago…we went on a night out and we both got very drunk. In the early hours of the morning, we headed back to mine, where he was staying over. I was nearly blackout drunk at this point. He slept on the sofa and me in my own bedroom. Shortly after going to bed, unconsciously, I went up to him while he was sleeping and asked him if he wanted his dick sucked.

He asked me to repeat what I said and I asked him again. I’ll be honest, I thought this was an actual dream that I was having and in that moment I didn’t have any control over my actions. He left my house immediately. The next morning, I apologised – I was devastated. He replied saying that he needed time to think about our friendship etc.

He ended the friendship. I was devastated, gutted and depressed. I lost my closest friend at that point. Anyway, we haven’t spoken in two years. I still think of him most days. I get we won’t ever be friends again but I yearn to serve him even if it is transactional. I was always pretty submissive to him and wanted to please him.

I have often wondered what would happen if I tried to approach him like you have advised on this blog.

Previously he had confided in me that he is a very sexual man and needs frequent service, when talking about problems with his girlfriend (they are still together).

I would love to worship and serve him but I don’t know if I should try to or not. In my eyes, he is a god alpha and deserves true worship. While we were friends, I buried these feelings as best I could but I guess I have lost everything now anyway.

What are your thoughts?

What a heartbreaking letter! I’m so sorry that this happened! 

Sadly, this is always the danger when a faggot offers himself to an Alpha friend. It’s hard to say whether or not the way you offered yourself might have scared him, but he did take some time to think about his decision. That’s tough. 

This Alpha seems like a wonderful Man, very strong and confident. I’m disappointed that he cut you off without much of a discussion. However, I’m sure he did it because he thought continuing the friendship would only lead to pushing you further into obsession. 

I don’t know if there is a way to resurrect the relationship. A long friendship like this shouldn’t be tossed away forever, and I’m sure he agrees with that if he’s anything like I think he is. I don’t think it would be a bad idea to reach out via a message and just tell him you miss him and you’re sorry for what you said when you were drunk. If there could be a way to just talk, I’m sure the situation could be repaired. 

I know you feel embarrassed and scared of him now, but just be tactful and maintain your faith in the friendship you built with him. Keep me informed! 

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