Why im not an Alpha
Hi Sam, thanks for taking the time to respond and by presenting another alternative (that I’m actually an Alpha who has just slid off track).
I would say I’m definitely not an Alpha for a few reasons:
- I have always felt like I needed to be spanked since my early teen years (the humiliation, pain, vulnerability and exposure all turn me on so much) - spanking was the “gateway” kink to realising humiliation has been at the centre off all my kinks (sissy/cfnm/cmnm/forcedbi/faggotry/slavery/chastity/exposure). I believe true Alphas will have been fantasising about using their cocks, not being naked over someone’s lap getting their bare bottoms spanked.
- I like topping, but I couldn’t be satisfied form only topping. I’ve also failed to get hard several times to fuck women because it made me feel like I was too dominant (I also don’t like receiving blowjobs). But if I start typing about how I want a big strong man to grab me, force me on my knees dump his loads down my throat I start straining in my cage.
- I started doing onlyfans with my ex girlfriend doing Femdom (me dressed like a sissy or just naked and in chastity getting my balls busted, spanked, pegged and humiliated). I signed a blackmail contract and she made me start serving men (filmed my first time sucking cock and uploaded it). We broke up a while ago but knowing she still has embarrassing photos/videos of me turns me on so much.
I don’t know if I’m a faggot, but sexually I’m definitely not an Alpha. I feel like the powerful ‘Alpha’ side of me that is a strong, assertive, dominant fight fuels my faggot, cocksucking, sissy humiliation side and vice versa.
The more powerful I feel, the better the high when I’m on my knees being humiliated.
The more of a pathetic faggot I am, the stronger I feel I need to workout and train.
I like knowing that I’m a sub who is powerful, a bit like a gladiator or guard dog. Powerful, strong and uncontrollable unless you’re my Master.
It’s hard to communicate everything well in such a short message but any help is greatly appreciated 🙏
