How do I gain confidence ?

Hi fag Sam,

Let’s call me Flynn (anonymous purposes). I have always been attracted to masculine and muscular men and I have tried submission but it just didn’t work for me. But in my head, it sounds like a great idea. I’m very sensible to touch, which means it’s hard for other people to get into intemacy with me. And on antoher hand, I always felt like I’ve always been a top, but I’m a very socially anxious person, so I dont’t feel very confident just even showing myself.
I’m working on getting fitter, but I know this is not the only way I can improve my self confidence. Do you have advice ? And do you know how can I explore being a top and a Master (since I also feel like I need to be desired and worshipped) ?

I’m sorry if it’s not very clear but I really wanted to talk it out.