Hi Sam, so I have a question for you basically what do I do?

I used to work with this guy several years ago, even back then he was pretty buff and really good looking even then (he’s gotten even better since) and we ended up going our separate ways professionally but a couple years ago he added me on as a friend on FB. He has chatted me up a coupe time, in a very “how’s life, how’s work,” kind of way. He was also always pretty religious, or at least I got that impression.

We hadn’t chatted in probably 6 months then a week ago he hit me up in the middle of the day on a work day talking about how he was going to miss summer and how he got these European swim suits on a whim when he was feeling brave, and how he’d probably look ridiculous in them. Because he’s a former coworker I’ve always kinda kept the conversation on that level, but that day because it all seemed playful and such I was like “oh I’m sure it’s not that bad, or I’m sure you’ll look great etc.” Long story short he ends up sending me several pictures modeling these swimsuits that basically show his whole ass and leaves very little to the imagination for his package and he is really amazing I have to say.

Anyway I don’t know if he knew I’m gay or not before, but he does now because I got a little excited and when he said some more self deprecating stuff I said something along the lines of “well you just made me pre, so I’m sure you’ll have that effect on others.” (he laugh reacted to that statement) and the conversation kind of tapered off after that. I apologized for sharing too much information to him and the conversation ended with him saying “you’re fine” to the apology.

So I guess my question(s) are these: does he sound like a possible alpha maybe chumming the water? And if so what if anything should I do next? Or should I just wait?

That was like a week ago and we haven’t talked since and I don’t want to do the wrong thing if this was all weirdly innocent. Thank you for the help Sam.

Thanks for the question, brother!

First of all, even if you hadn’t revealed your true nature to him with your little “joke”, I believe he already knew you were gay (although he may not know/understand about faggots). Why do I think that? Because what he’s doing with you I doubt he’s doing with other Alpha friends. 

I tend to agree with your idea that he’s “chumming the water” (very nice turn of phrase!), and I’m sure he liked the idea that he turned you on. Most straight Men and Alphas like to be attractive to others and like to hear how their sex appeal turns others on, even faggots that they don’t have an interest in. 

Here’s my question: is there a way for you to actually serve this Alpha? He’s moved away, so how would that even work even if he was interested in using you? 

The other thing I’m wondering about is how the conversation tapered off after the comment. He may have liked it, but his religious beliefs could make him feel guilty or dirty. 

I don’t really know if this is worth pursuing, honestly, but if you wanted to try you could simply start up a conversation with him and steer it toward Hierarchy. Ask him if he considers himself to be Alpha and see how he reacts.

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Hi Sam,

Great blog, it’s helped me realise my beta/fag side and my lust for worshipping alphas.

I need your advice…I had a straight alpha best friend for 10 years. When we became friends, I wasn’t ‘out’. We were very close… going to the gym, going out drinking (him picking up girls) etc.

He was a natural alpha…hot body, great looks, supreme confidence, controlled aggression, and a big cock (he told me and I can verify as I saw it!). He had the pick of women and would regularly tell me of his sexual activities and how women went crazy over his cock. During our friendship he told me numerous times that he knows he is an Alpha and I can tell he enjoys having control over others.

Some of the activities we would do when I was still in the closet involved sleeping in the same bed and aggressively play fighting in our boxer shorts where he would regularly pin me down – I loved it! Frequently, he would pin me down in his boxers by sitting on my chest with his knees over my shoulders, so I couldn’t move my arms, with me ‘pretending’ to struggle while staring at his big bulge. I loved the submissive nature of it and I think he enjoyed the dominance.

On another occasion, we nearly showered together after a drunken night out but he stopped after seeing I was getting a hard-on. Damn!

Anyway, after around 5 years into our friendship, I came out to him when drunk and he accepted me 100%. I was so scared, as previously he had made some jokingly homophobic comments, but he didn’t let it affect our friendship and would often stick up for me if we went out on nights out etc.

Fast forward to around 2 years ago…we went on a night out and we both got very drunk. In the early hours of the morning, we headed back to mine, where he was staying over. I was nearly blackout drunk at this point. He slept on the sofa and me in my own bedroom. Shortly after going to bed, unconsciously, I went up to him while he was sleeping and asked him if he wanted his dick sucked.

He asked me to repeat what I said and I asked him again. I’ll be honest, I thought this was an actual dream that I was having and in that moment I didn’t have any control over my actions. He left my house immediately. The next morning, I apologised – I was devastated. He replied saying that he needed time to think about our friendship etc.

He ended the friendship. I was devastated, gutted and depressed. I lost my closest friend at that point. Anyway, we haven’t spoken in two years. I still think of him most days. I get we won’t ever be friends again but I yearn to serve him even if it is transactional. I was always pretty submissive to him and wanted to please him.

I have often wondered what would happen if I tried to approach him like you have advised on this blog.

Previously he had confided in me that he is a very sexual man and needs frequent service, when talking about problems with his girlfriend (they are still together).

I would love to worship and serve him but I don’t know if I should try to or not. In my eyes, he is a god alpha and deserves true worship. While we were friends, I buried these feelings as best I could but I guess I have lost everything now anyway.

What are your thoughts?

What a heartbreaking letter! I’m so sorry that this happened! 

Sadly, this is always the danger when a faggot offers himself to an Alpha friend. It’s hard to say whether or not the way you offered yourself might have scared him, but he did take some time to think about his decision. That’s tough. 

This Alpha seems like a wonderful Man, very strong and confident. I’m disappointed that he cut you off without much of a discussion. However, I’m sure he did it because he thought continuing the friendship would only lead to pushing you further into obsession. 

I don’t know if there is a way to resurrect the relationship. A long friendship like this shouldn’t be tossed away forever, and I’m sure he agrees with that if he’s anything like I think he is. I don’t think it would be a bad idea to reach out via a message and just tell him you miss him and you’re sorry for what you said when you were drunk. If there could be a way to just talk, I’m sure the situation could be repaired. 

I know you feel embarrassed and scared of him now, but just be tactful and maintain your faith in the friendship you built with him. Keep me informed! 

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